Wednesday, February 15
I have taken a long break from blogging since I became a mother, and have really missed it.
I have still been learning about not comparing my life with other people. There were times when I envied people with kids so deeply that I couldn't enjoy what was going on in the present. I was angry at God and the world.
The crazy thing about human nature is now that I have a baby, I compare myself with other women my age with active careers, without kids, and I wonder if I should have pursued more of a career when I had the time. I have been trying to think of what else I will do. I feel I need a title, that somehow being a Mother is not enough. This thought is short lived, however, because when I look at Justin, hold him, feed him and take care of him, I am gently reminded that this is what I have waited for not only during the time we have been trying to adopt, but my whole life. Maybe a career will be out there someday, but for now, this is my passion, and parenting is what I love.
Psalm 8:2a says "You have taught children and infants to worship." When I look into Justin's eyes as he laughs and smiles, I see evidence that he is worshiping in the purest sense of the word.
I am so in love with this baby! I never knew just how rewarding parenting would be. Thanks to all of you who have prayed for us to have a child.
I have been going through my pictures, and have enjoyed looking at this album of Italy. I was able to go over last year to attend a conference. This was the first time I have been back in twenty years. The pictures are made up mostly of places we lived as a family. My brother and I were able to go together, and we were graciously hosted by some friends of ours from language school in Perugia. I feel such a sense of nostalgia when I look at these pictures. I miss Italy so much. It was strange to go back as a tourist knowing I would be returning to the US after such a short time. Tonight I made cookies with Nutella in them, and I remembered how much I enjoyed the simple pleasures. Fortunately, you can find it here! Saturday, we are going up to my brother's house to celebrate a late Thanksgiving, only we will be making homemade tortellini instead of turkey. Happy Thanksgiving!